Surgery at Sunrise

Where to begin….?? Umm. I guess with my plans for tomorrow.  I’m having surgery in the morning.  I tore a ligament or two (hopefully that’s it) in my wrist at the beginning of November and have had appointments with doctors for MRIs and Xrays, more x-rays and follow-up appointments and surgical consultations.  And it all comes down to tomorrow.  On the MRIs there wasn’t a lot of clear information about what exactly was wrong and how wrong things may be- so that’s what surgery is for.  Depending on how bad, or good (whichever one is appropriate to use) the damage is or isn't,  I could be back to lifting in two weeks or worse case scenario I have pins put in my hand and am in a cast for two months and back in full swing in a year.  That’s hard to wrap my mind around.  How do I prepare for that? how do I hope for the best (2 weeks out) and still have the bad looming.  Is it better for me to start preparing myself to be out a year and be pleasantly surprised when it’s less? Do I hope it’s only 2 weeks and then be devastated when it’s longer…?

Is there a right or a good way to prepare for something like this? Will I be relieved when I wake up or will the reality of the situation be too much (especially if it’s bad news)… I like to have things planned out and know what I’m doing and what I need to do.  I don’t have that right now.  Surgery is the easy part.  I know that’s going to happen. It’s what happens after surgery… that’s the scary part.

This was what I was referring to in my last blog about the American Open… These thoughts, feelings, and emotions all hit me as I walked off the platform.  Up until the American Open I was lying to myself about the situation and not letting myself think about surgery when I still was lifting. Maybe that was dumb. Maybe I should have processed it all as it came.  But there’s still not a lot I DO know for sure.  The only for sure thing is surgery.  What they’ll fix and exactly how they’ll fix it… fill in the blanks and take your best guess..I have no idea, but in about 12 hours it will all be said and done and there might eventually be a blog entry about the results…eventually. 

Here's to hoping for the best...